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Friday, December 17, 2010

The "Yogi Bear" movie looks like shit. And fuck Betty White.

This new Yogi Bear movie that's coming out looks like it's going to suck hard. A lot of these CGI animated movies have really set the bar high (i.e., Toy Story, Up, The Incredibles, etc.) and this movie clearly makes zero attempt at surpassing any of that. Instead it just modernized a shit cartoon that hadn't been modernized yet and adds 3D rendering just in time for the holiday season.

There's a reason this fucking cartoon hasn't been modernized yet. There's a very specific reason why Garfield and Alvin and the Chipmunks, both shitty movies in their own right, have been CGI rendered several years ago while no one has bothered up until now to touch Yogi Bear. That reason is FUCK YOGI BEAR. Even my grandchildren skipped over that cartoon. Those dumb, drooling children, in an era before Cartoon Network was around, who lived and breathed for anything animated on television...they still thought Yogi Bear was just too retarded for words.

But of course the movie is going to be a hit. It will even be number one for a while. Because there are plenty of fucktards who will find this funny for no reason other than the fact that it has talking animals. Even in the absence of any wit or genuine comedic writing, the sole presence of talking animals will light up their world. And I'm talking about adults, not children.

And on an unrelated note, fuck Betty White. I hate it when forum trolling goblins get together and decide what is ironic and funny. And then they become vindicated when their inside joke comes to SNL to quickly die.