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Sunday, December 19, 2010

Obviously Broke Celebrities

The Allstate Guy

"You're in good hands...with Allstate." Was it worth it? How much did you make for doing those commercials? I hope it was enough to last you the rest of your life because you are never going to get another job again. I'm pretty sure any time a casting director sees your name he thinks to himself, "Uhh...isn't that the guy from the Allstate commercials? Let's go with the guy who played Deebo in Friday instead."

Kate from "Lost"

I just saw her in a commercial for Live Links phone chat. And this was like about a year after Lost ended. How fucking fast did you spend your money, Kate? You weren't some fringe character on the show. You were a primary character for all 6 seasons on one of the biggest shows on tv. For fuck's sake, at least do a Proactive commercial or something...I mean, a sex chat commercial?

Update: I just found out that she did this commercial before she did "Lost." Whatever, she still probably can't manage her money properly.

Randy Quaid

This guy was caught squatting in his own house. He then fled to Canada and said he was on the run from a mysterious killer who was going after celebrities. There's no punchline here because I genuinely feel bad for him.

Lucy Liu

She's been in "Charlie's Angels" and in "Kill Bill." Now you can catch her on Lifetime.